November 26, 2011

I should hang in there.

This time I don't completely understand of how I should put me in a right position. I still can't say that I'm strong enough to continue this myself. This is the point where I can't do anything about it and accept whatever that happened. As I have been thinking, I was really sorry and I still don't know whether it was the right decision to make. I know it doesn't really mean anything for now anymore, but it has been a precious moment where you were part of my life and where I thought I would never lose you. It's probably too late now and I always want you to be happy. That was always be the reason I'm holding on to you from the beginning. I wish I could see things in a bigger perspective, but I'm trying hard now not to be a narrow-minded person. This time has finally come, the biggest fear of my life it could ever be. I have to face it and I should not longer become a weak person. This is the point where my mind and heart battling so hard, figuring out the best way to overcome this and make it balance again, and yet I still couldn't find the way. I have done whatever I can, in every possible way, but then I realize again that this is the real answer and I should not ask for more. And this would ever be the last words I want to say, "thank you" :)

Happy birthday Mumsie!




Baked specially for my mum who was having her 51st birthday yesterday :)

Happy birthday Mumski!
I wish you happiness and healthiness, and never give up of being a perfect mom. 
You have always been the greatest mom ever, taught me to be who I am, a stronger me
that can always rely on God. 
Stay young and beautiful :)

Love & pray,

Your daughter

November 19, 2011

I still survive.


Firstly I want to say good luck for friends who are still having final exams. Keep trying and do your very best, let God do the rest :) 
I believe in every hard work you did, you'll gain an achievement you've never expected before. Tee-hee...

Anyways, it's been my 3rd week of break and what I got is a load, bunch lists to do from work. But always thanking God for this that I got the chance of getting the hang of how actually  accounts assistance and administration work feel like. I experienced Quickbooks as well! All I ever knew was I heard accounting people using it, and it's popular. So I'm having a big smile inside that I can actually operate it myself. Hohoho. Not a big achievement though, but still. At least I know I could fix my failure in accounting in past experience for now. 

I'm also preparing myself for the final year project at uni that I'll be doing next semester. Can't believe it's my real final semester next year. I'm praying hard so that I would be in a group of good students, have a nice client for the project, and I have a feeling that I should learn the programming again during the holiday... Or, if I'm being accepted for the Professional Practice (hopefully I make it!), my dream of becoming a full timer at the CBD would become reality... *keep my finger crossed*

And, a big annual concert of my music company are coming up next week. I've pretty much coped up with stress for some of my students that keep asking silly questions like:
"What I'm going to play again for the recital? I completely forgot." or
"What does concert mean? I don't get that." OR 
"So... I'm doing the piece, and you're gonna be watching me? Aren't you supposed to be teaching me?" 


However, they are all awesome kids after all :) I'm going to make them cupcakes for christmas present, I hope it'll turn well. 
And for me myself, I'm going to perform a duet with boss. Hopefully I could cope with the pressure, lols. 

And, it's exactly 4 weeks for mom's coming and Sydney. Then home. Then (hopefully) Singapore :) 

And, I still think that I shouldn't have let it happened  from the beginning. But I still survive. I don't want to give up, I never want to. I'm just hoping for the best to come, through God :)

Taken at Louis Baxter, Subiaco.

November 10, 2011

Chocolate chip cookies.

The only thing I'd love to do, killing time and getting myself out from this anxious thought I have at the moment. I dug up mom's recipes in my drawer and this is enough to make me feel calm for a moment :)




With a glass of hot milk you will get the hang of how this could turn your mood upside down :)

I wish I could bake this for you, to cheer you up in the FYP you might be working on right now. I wish to hear from you soon :) 

November 8, 2011

Dedicated posts.

I've been a wreck lately. I finished my exams, the very last exams of my degree, but I'm supposed to be jumping and running around to celebrate this. Instead I found myself crying out, hiding in the corner of my bedroom every night, hiding from the reality that I wish it would never happen. I've never been like this and I don't know why. I lost one more person who is too important to me and there's nothing I can do. There's nothing I can do to make you stay and I can just say, here I am, I'll try my very best for your happiness :)
You've been my precious gift and I learnt everything of life lesson because of you.
Thank you for being my loyal reader, and if you notice every single post I wrote lately is only for you :)