September 15, 2011

As I contemplate.

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At the time I wrote this post, I was thinking of this could be the hardest part of my life. Well, at least for now. Who knows what I'm going to face in the near future or even plans further up. 
This is also the first time I miss my family back home so bad. It sometimes feels weird, when I suddenly thought of visiting grandma when I talked with mom on the phone, but it's like miles away, crossing continents that I wanna shout out, "Can't I be rich and book tickets home whenever I want?". I miss my best friends too, thinking of having a getaway with them someday. As we have grown up together now I couldn't say how good it is to have a chat with them, not as a high schooler who only talks about boyfriend, ex, homeworks, and so forth. If I'm being asked, whether I wanted to go back to high school times, then I would say, no thanks. I'm pretty comfortable with my life now. Taking a step up from a teenager to a fully grown up woman, I'm probably in the transition of them. I can see how big the changes have happened, like really. I was being selfish, I had such a bad temper, I didn't want to lose, I didn't care much of people, I talked craps, I took everything in shortcut, and many more I couldn't even remember. I can see life has taught me to care more and appreciate all people around you. It's beautiful to see how we can love people around us and they will eventually love us back. Love, is probably who plays the main role. Being 20 is where the process starts to make you ready and fully prepared for the next couple of years. It doesn't matter if I have to face the future all by myself and being parted from my family, or having to be a single for now. I want to be completely a single, until I feel that I can live by myself then I have reached what it takes to be a single. By the time I can be a whole single, shatterproof, then it's the sign of readiness. What leads me to my condition right now, would be the continuously support and love from my family and friends, back home and here. For everyone who feels the same way as I do, let us give thanks to God that He gave us this way to make us stronger and good things always come to those who faithfully wait in Him :) 

3 comments:

  1. Cindyy mana like buttonnya ya?

    Cindy jgn sedih yaa, karena tiap event sudah di atur :)

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  2. Wow, you are more mature than I thought you were.
    Don't worry you are loved by Him. Have the support from your family and best buddies :)

    Yes, I do feel the same as you do,
    so let us cheers to Him and always grateful for everything that happened that made us stronger xp

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  3. Eli: Hehehe makasih ya Li! Iyah bener, harus belajar sabar kayaknya Li :)

    Joko: Lol. Thanks Jok! :)

    ReplyDelete